Ego and Integrity

Most of the world’s problems would be solved if we had more integrity and less ego. Integrity can be looked at in a multitude of ways but mainly this is about being a person who can be trusted – your word means something. It is about work ethics, which seem to be quickly deteriorating as employers concern themselves more with quotas and less on employee morale and investing in employees and keeping the good ones they have. The recession has made ethics fall apart as employers are uninterested in quality. That is if your job hasn’t already been shipped off to China where slaves are now doing the work. Ego is pretty simple. Someone is all about themself and making sure they shine, regardless of who falls apart around them.

In our daily life integrity is about being the parent that a child can trust, that the partner can depend on. Our family life should be a team experience. Mom/Dad (or mom/mom, dad/dad, etc..) are the heads of the company and they make the rules for the household. This should be based on values, budgets, spirituality and love. If you are not capable of tackling these items, with integrity, you should not invest in children or enter a relationship with someone who has children.

Ego is the family that has addicts and the household revolves around the user. It is the family with a partner that everyone feels responsible for, because they emotionally manipulate everyone with their problems. It is the parent who is more invested in the secondary relationship with an outside person than their own family. The parent who is not grown-up and expects the other to take care of them, along with the children.

Integrity creates a successful group of people or company or relationship because all are invested in being seen as dependable and being one you can hold accountable for their actions. Ego causes others to suffer, including the self.

To have integrity one must be concerned with the fact that they are an individual living on a planet of other humans. They must be conscious of the fact that they are not alone. This involves being concerned about the world around you and taking heed as to how your actions might affect others. Making sure the world does not revolve around you. Listening to others and thinking about what it is they are saying. Making agreements with others and taking them seriously rather than tongue in cheek. Being honest with people about whether you will or will not be involved in an action or a request.

Individual integrity has to do with how you personally live your life. From daily grooming ritual to your domestic outlook to your car to your workplace. How do you present yourself to the world? If one is living in a filthy home and does not brush their teeth, this is not a person of much integrity when they are unable to manage themself. A person who allows their children to run their lives – this person does not have a high degree of integrity. You would not want to invest in supporting them as the likely output would be shoddy.

To shift your consciousness and begin to have less ego and more integrity involves wanting to make this change. Your partner and family cannot ask you to change, this is something you must want to do yourself.  This would involve self-exploration and work with teachers. Here are some ways to begin doing this:

1. Volunteer – to step outside of yourself a good first move is to agree to help out a community center or non-profit. When you have begun serving those less fortunate than you, suddenly the world seems different. You become humbled by the plight of others.

2. Books – read books on philosophy, self-help, motivational speakers (not the ones trying to make you rich but wanting you to become a better person spiritually). Read books about politics, global economics, things that will give you a sense of what is happening in the world outside yourself.

3. Board of Directors – if you are a professional serve on the board of directors at a non-profit and provide consultation on their business.

4. Psychotherapy – dig into your inner psyche and begin to expand your consciousness, clean up the early psychic wounds.

5. Health – see a doctor and follow-up on your health. Take care of yourself.

6. Physical Fitness – develop a routine, make it a hobby.

7. Food – be conscious of what you take into your body. You don’t need to become a vegetarian or vegan necessarily to do this.  You do need to eat healthy, organic, locally grown foods and spend less time at the restaurants (no fast food at all). What goes in supports proper brain function, keeps the body running happily and smoothly. Drink lots of water to flush out impurities and all that bad food you’ve been eating all these years.

8. Vitamins – go to a health food store and talk to them about what vitamins you might need for your body. Perhaps you already know you are anemic – iron. Don’t drink milk anymore – Calcium. Want to stay healthy – Vit C for immune system. It only hurts to take vitamins if you take too many.

9. Family – how can you clean up the living arrangements you are in? You may need a therapist to work with you on this and even a lawyer – if things are beyond repair.

10. Communication – listen to what others have to say. Think about this before you respond. Think about them before you respond. Don’t leave conversations one-sided, be a part of the flow. Communication is a tennis match without the competition. Two players volleying back and forth words.

11. Friends – surround yourself with good people who are also invested in the world around them. Who are conscious of having integrity. Let go of the toxic relationships that are focused only on themselves.

12. Gandhi – You must be the change you wish to see in the world. Make this quote your mantra until you really get it.

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