Being A Woman

The Beauty of a Woman 

a poem by Audrey Hepburn

The beauty of a woman
isn’t in the clothes she wears,
The figure that she carries,
or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman
must be seen from in her eyes;
Because that’s the doorway to her heart,
the place where love resides.

The beauty of a woman
isn’t in a facial mole;
But true beauty in a woman,
is reflected by her soul.

It’s the caring that she cares to give,
the passion that she shows;
And the beauty of a woman
with passing years only grows.

 

The beauty we each have is individual, spiritual, unique, and a blessing. Many women do not feel this way, no matter how many times someone tells them. They want to hear it only from the man they love and often the one who wants this attracts a man (or woman) who is unable to say it – or doesn’t really feel this way.

The difficulty is that being a woman is hard when you have grown up with men slobbering over your body or touching you or have watched the media show you that you are fat when you are a size 10 or your mother saying that we all have to go on a diet. It is a challenge because we are mothers whose bodies get stretched and yanked into all different positions and this makes it hard to keep in balance and fit. When we get older our bodies droop and sag, our insides come out from babies and surgeries, our bladder leaks, our breasts get tumors, our hormones are off balance and our moods swing too and fro.

We don’t feel sexy enough, pretty enough, tall enough, thin enough, smart enough, good enough.

No one but yourself can make you feel beautiful. It is important to surround yourself with beauty and to take care of yourself so that you feel good inside. If we live with people who do not support us, respect us, love us, or value our thoughts, then we will feel ugly. This is not going to change because your partner is not going to change – but YOU can! Many times women are afraid of change and choose to stay in an unhealthy situation. It is too scary to leave and have to do life on your own. I can PROMISE you that it will be safer to make your own decisions and to live the life you want.

Loneliness and sadness; this is much better than abuse. It is much better than feeling the pain of a partner who does not love or support you. When you are ALONE, surround yourself with friends who do like and support you. Who will want to spend time with you and keep you occupied. Go to nice dinners, see movies together, don’t live in a cave. Many women live on their own but tend to hide there – this is why single women get a bad wrap. This is a choice they are making, it is not what life is like on your own. Being without a partner is not fun at night but it is also not fun to have one who is not calling you back, or is out with someone else, or you suspect as much.

Sometimes we have to be alone in order to find ourselves. Being alone forces you to think for yourself and think about who you are and what you want out of life. Remember being a young girl and doing a collage? Make one for yourself now! Put cut out photos on a poster board or words that describe what you want for yourself. Pull out your “diary” that we now call a journal and write. Attend a workshop on self-empowerment, go to a woman’s retreat, get in a woman’s group, read books, do therapy.

It is also possible that you are meant to be alone in this lifetime. Don’t imagine this but allow yourself the freedom to accept this and it will give you the space to be happy once you do. When we let go of our hold on what we are trying to own or possess, there is no more resistance. Without resistance we have the ability to live.

You are a beautiful woman. You are intelligent, strong, powerful, healthy, wise, loving, and a whole lot more (fill in whatever moves you). Don’t roll your eyes. Read the first two sentences in this paragraph again and take a deep breath as you bring it in to your awareness. You are a beautiful woman.

When we, as women are able to believe in ourselves without being dependent on someone doing this for us, we will become a stronger gender as a whole. It is not man’s fault that we are divided or that we are held down. We do and allow this because that is what we are taught and what we have believed. We must take responsibility for our happiness and when this happens, there will be less competition between us and more unity amongst all of us as we happily embrace each other as sisters.

 
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