All through this movie last evening, I found myself silently clapping for this young feminist woman who embodies the behavior that once was and should continue to be. The girl who waits, who asks for what she wants, who sets boundaries, she is the heroine I am trying to explain in my new book “You Don’t Need a Prince to Lead a Charming Life.” This girl who becomes a woman in front of our eyes and not because she suddenly has sex. It is the scene on the boat where her survival skills are put to the test and you are not only relieved that she will definitely be a strong character but you also know that now she is a woman in the making. I was thrilled also to see that they downplayed the extroverted wayward girls in favor of the chaste one. Not only this but it showed how these girls began to realize that she was the one to be in awe of, rather than themselves.
The most important piece of the film, which is toward the end, is the woman who stands as the voice of reason. In the film, she is portrayed as the “bitch,” and she certainly comes across that way but she actually makes our main character wake up and smell the coffee. As an elder woman now I can understand why we want to make her the bad guy and even my fellow elder female friend and I looked at each other after and said “She needed that.” Always, we want to look down on our elder wiser women of the community – which is what makes them/us come across as the bitch in the first place. They tire of the disrespect from insolent young women. We are so frustrated when we see these younger women who are making such fools of themselves and we sit there feeling unable to help them. Sometimes we put our foot forward and spew out an uncontrollable amount of spit in a passive/aggressive way that does come across as mean. My late ancestors and a great older friend did this to me and now I turn to them late at night and thank them for their patience and tolerance of my ignorance.
Why are young women so eager to let go and give up everything they have for a man in today’s society? Single parenting creates a need for love from a man that they rarely have unless of course it is mom’s boyfriend or other family member who takes advantage in the worst way possible. Our society glamorizes this lifestyle as if it is just part of life. By being politically correct we not only continue to patronize but pathologically make it acceptable. Being in denial about an issue that needs to be spoken about in an honest and intellectual way continues to make life difficult for all these unplanned children.
Young girls, please pay attention to the message of this film. It is how young girls used to be but it could be the way you are now. She gets everything she wants in the end and isn’t that what you really want?